Men & Women Working Together: The Frum Woman’s Perspective: | Risks, Concerns, and Practical Solutions

Hello,

Thank you so much for the most recent episode about mixed workplaces. It was relevant and inspiring. I have a follow-up question that I would love to see addressed on Headlines.

I am a proud Bais Yaakov graduate who works in a frum, but mixed, environment. This comes with many benefits, but with some challenges as well. While I don’t need to explain halachos of shomer negiah or yichud, some of the interactions and conversations between colleagues are “heimish” and casual. There’s often joking and laughter. Nothing overtly inappropriate, but I often wonder if it is proper behavior. (I would like to mention that when I interact with male colleagues one-on-one, I keep things strictly professional. The interactions I am referring to take place when groups of people are together.)

I was wondering if the unique challenges of the frum work environment can be addressed on the podcast. I would also like to hear about these challenges from a woman’s perspective as well.

Thank you for the work that you do.

The Pesach programs are advertising full force. Everything is glatt mehadrin, non gerbrokts etc. I checked out a couple with CRC and was told the program and mashgiach were not recommended. The same applies to cruises that offer “fresh, kosher” sailings. Friends went on one of those cruises and came back shocked that they served raspberries and blackberries which every kashrus organization says are impossible to clean for bugs. The sailings are sold out months in advance. I don’t want to mention the Rabbi who runs the program but again was told by CRC that his hashgacha is not recommended. Most people assume that a Pesach program that advertises itself as Glatt mehadrin, non gebrokts, no kitniyos is perfect.
How do you educate people that they have to do their due diligence?
If I have friends that tell me they are going on one of these programs, do I mind my own business or say something?
When my husband and I began traveling several years ago , we went on tours advertised as above, including pas yisroel and chalav yisroel where available. My first bad experience occurred when we were served hard boiled eggs for shalosh seudos. I asked if the kosher caterer had prepared them and was told they came from the hotel kitchen. When I questioned the group leader about bishul akum, she told me to stop being such a rebbetzen. ( I am so far from that- I am just machmir about kashrus).
Next time, we tried another group tour that promised a mashgiach would accompany us. They promised a lot of things to different group members but the kashrus was even more questionable. In a similar theme, we spend winters in a community where everyone is very sociable and we are always invited to different homes for shabbos meals. There are many people who think that “shabbos mode” on their ovens allows them to warm up lunch in the oven. Those using a plata are warming up meats in sauces etc. Before seeing this, I would not have hesitated to eat in their homes. I’m not even going to start on checking lettuce and using broccoli etc. If nothing else, thank you for allowing me to vent.
Your podcasts are great and I have gotten a lot of my friends “hooked” on them.
PS. We still travel a lot with a suitcase full of peanut butter, tuna, crackers and my own hard boiled egg cooker, lol.

I enjoyed the shiur very much.
I was wondering why the idea that maybe a frum jew should not even enter a highly corporatized work place in the first place did not come up.
Is it necessary to enter the most competitive corners of the workplace where many of the issues discussed are most prevalent?
In many smaller firms whether in law, accounting, investing, etc. There is in general less pressure, hours and travel which could help alleviate many of these issues.
Obviously there are challenges everywhere but maybe it would be worth not taking that “great” wall street job if it mean putting yourself in danger. As an alternative to what some of the panelist were discussing; maybe some people are not up for the challenge of being on wall street or going to trade shows in Las Vegas and would be better served going for a lower paying more local option.
The sacrifice of being a frum jew maybe should not take place once you are on the road in a non kosher restaurant or tempted by being served wine by a non-jew but well before that by choosing a profession or employer that is more conducive to a frum life style.
I would love to hear your thought on that.
Thank you!

Rabbi Wasserman
Thank you for your podcast — I really appreciate the thought and effort that went into it. It was engaging and clearly came from a place of care and sincerity.
That said, I felt that something important might have been missed. As Orthodox Jews, we don’t need to apologize for who we are. Our way of life, our traditions, and our values are not something to explain away — they’re something to stand tall with.
Just like others proudly live their faith and culture, we too should speak and carry ourselves with confidence and pride. Orthodoxy isn’t about being defensive — it’s about being grounded, grateful, and proud of our path
We don’t apologize for being Orthodox.
Muslim wears a hijab with pride, or when an Asian elder keeps their traditions alive. They’re respected for honoring their roots.
So why should it be any different for us?
I meet people from all over the world — customers from Ghana, proud Christians who carry Biblical names like David, Sarah, or Michael. I meet people from Nigeria with long, unique names that reflect their culture and faith — and they say those names with pride.
They don’t shorten them.
They don’t hide them.
They own them.
So why should we, the people who gave the world those very same Biblical names, hide behind secular ones?
Let’s stop apologizing for who we are.
Let’s stop translating our souls into something “easier” or “more American.”
Thank you again for sparking such important conversations. I hope we keep building more honest and proud voices within our community.

Dear Halacha Headlines,
I’d like to suggest a topic that feels both urgent and under-discussed: Has Yiddishkeit turned into a culture more than a religion?
It’s become surprisingly easy to be “frum” today — to keep mitzvos, fit into the system, and feel part of something — yet the foundation of belief, understanding, and inner connection seems weaker than ever. Have we built a culture that prioritizes belonging and appearance over conviction and depth?

There’s enormous emphasis on Gemara as the beginning, middle, and end of growth — while gemara is the torah shebal peh and of course it should be learned and taught, but have we lost sight of the core values and clarity that Torah was meant to transmit? For example, if a typical rebbi or kollel yungerman can’t articulate the Aseres Hadibros, that’s not a critique of knowledge — but can it be a sign that we may have drifted from the basics?

So what would it take for our generation to rebuild emunah, yiras Shamayim, and passion — not just comfort and culture? Many turn to Chassidus as the cure, but perhaps that’s treating symptoms, not the root.

Thank you for considering this topic — if this topic was not already covered think it is a needed conversation.