What are the biggest challenges, struggles and difficulties confronting our boys today?
How do those challenges differ from those of the girls?
What impact are technology and alcohol consumption having on the boys?
Should Gemara be the focus of yeshiva learning?
What’s holding the boys back from performing at their best?
Rabbi Naftali Kaplan, zekan hamashgichim B'Eretz Yisrael, mashgiach of Yeshivat Netiv Ha’Da’at
Kol Hakavod. I listen to your podcast each week and find it fascinating. I’m contacting you after listening to the latest podcast “What are yeshiva boys struggling with?”. At the beginning of your podcast, you say, “We are always blaming technology but what is the solution.” And you say you will address this in an upcoming podcast.
I am a parent of yeshiva boys ranging in age from 16-20. Their yeshiva has such a wonderful , tremendously successful way of handling the technology issue with buy-in from the bachurim.
The basic idea is to support and reward the students’ themselves for holding off on smart-phone use and to socialize outside of social media.
Each bachur has the opportunity to sign a commitment to refrain from personal smart phone use for the school year. The Rabbeim each have a relationship with their students and they discuss why this is an important initiate for them. Why they are investing time, money, energy into this initiative. They discuss pornography, distractions, etc. Then, close to the end of the year, she will again sign that she fulfilled her commitment. Each bachur who has refrains from smart phone use for the year is rewarded with an amazing trip together with her other friends who have refrained from smartphone use. (My sons just returned from a fully paid 5 day ski/whitewater rafting trip to the mountains of Tennessee which with 108 other boys who also didn’t use a smartphone for a year.) This was extremely effective for my sons and their friends and most of them fulfilled their commitment each year.
It gives the boys themselves the feeling that they are making a positive choice in their lives, has the effect of the entire group being more social, and supports the parents in their efforts to limit distractions and technology use.
At the same time, they are not saying that all technology is bad. Technology can many times be used as a tool in avodas Hashem. For example, I am the founder of MikvahCalendar.com, the Rabbinically approved app/online Mikvah calculator which is helping over 100,000 couples keep Taharas Hamishpachah b’hiddur. Couples from Modern Orthodox, to Satmar, to Litvish, give feedback about how much it helps them.
In summary, I love the above program that our boys’ Yeshiva runs. I think every school should run something similar. I’m trying to bring it to my girls’ school. When I spoke to mother’s at my girls’ school, so many loved the idea as it is so positive.